So there’s this horrible trait that comes with motherhood that no one seems to tell you about.. everyone is quick to tell you the positives, “Oh it’s amazing watching them learn” and “It’s the greatest thing you’ll ever know.” Don’t get me wrong they cover some negatives too “Oh you’ll never sleep again” or “oh there goes those savings” but there’s one thing people don’t mention, and it’s a whopper of a topic …
Oh yeah, it is real and it is vicious.
You feel guilty for nearly every action you make after having children.
Now in no way am I saying do not have kids, or its not worth it.
My girls are my world and through that guilt is this amazing adventure I never knew existed.
But the guilt is real… has she had the required amount of fruit and vegetables, have I read enough stories to her and said enough words, I haven’t heard a new word this week, I forgot to brush her teeth tonight, Did I tell her I love her today? Did I say it enough? Did I give her enough attention today? Did we watch to much television? Did I leave her in that nappy to long, is that why she has a rash? Has she had enough social interactions with other kids this week?
We didn’t leave the house today, no park, no museum, no playgroup or library.. did she notice?
You feel guilty for their happiness..
You are constantly worried if what you are doing is enough, are they happy?
And I have finally learned to accept that it’s okay if not every day is BIG, it is okay if you stayed in your pajamas all day, or you gave them Vegemite toast all day because it’s all they would eat. It is okay if you picked up your phone to check that notification and missed them doing something new.
KIDS DON’T CARE and this is the biggest point to remind yourself when that dreaded mum guilt strikes, kids don’t care where you are or what you’re doing (most of the time).
So long as you are with them and spending time together, whether that be eating chips and binging on cartoons or having them help you hang out that load of washing you’ve just washed for the third time.
Kids are simple beings that FIND their own fun (If we let them).
Some days I feel like the worlds greatest Pinterest mum, we make our own play dough, and do finger painting, we have the correct servings of fruit & veg, we are dressed and out the door by 9am. We don’t turn on the TV or use any devices.
Some days I nail this parenting gig with gold stars, but not every day!
So next time the guilt strikes, tell “it” .. NOT EVERY DAY NEEDS TO BE BIG!
The kids are fed, and clean and clothed. The kids are smiling and happy.
You have nothing to feel guilty about.